ART: Cartoon Double Feature

A Notable Foursome

Back in August I held a competition where people were able to send their suggestions as what I should draw for one of my December releases. I eventually chose Clone High and its character Joan of Arc, as I was already familiar with the series, it was easy to draw and it lacked erotic fan art. Also, Joan is voiced by Nicole "Shego" Sullivan...

I was originally going to feature just Joan blowing JFK but eventually more characters started popping in. First addition was Cleo muff-diving Joan, then I added Abe fucking Joan from behind and finally Gandhi videotaping the whole thing. I eventually left out Gandhi because I was too lazy to clean up his linework and it also shifted focus from the actual pic.

The alternative version here lacks cum.

This is the first pic of mine that uses illustration done with the dreaded pen tool in Photoshop. Artists like Levelord (and possibly DarkDP) use it constantly for "inking" their pics. I never really got the hang of it but I've finally decided to give it another try. The wavy thing at the background was done with the pen tool.

The winning suggestion was sent by Toonspew.

This was supposed to be a single pic. Of course, that didn't happen as you can see below...

Expensive to Touch

Sometimes you get crazy and decide to do something you probably wouldn't have normally done. This exactly what this pic is all about. I was originally meaning this one to be the next "Lite Art" pic but the inked pic looked so clean I decided to promote it to "Art" status.

Pteresa is essentially just a background character in MLaaTR, but rose to fame in the episode The Price of Love (which is also the name of a fuckawesome song by Roger Daltrey) where Sheldon essentially bought her as his girlfriend. After viewing the episode a few more times it didn't take long 'till I suddenly saw a pretty nasty analogy between it and essentially what you'd call as whoring yourself out. What the hell were the writers thinking?!

The alternative version is missing panties. I made this one so that in case someone wants to upload this pic to Paheal, they can use an official nude version instead of making a shitty fucking edit.

Those of you who know me better also know that I like to stick as close to the original design as possible. I'd say this one is almost an overkill as I didn't really change anything in the character design, not even her inverted-traffic-cones legs! The only addition that's me is of course how she looks like under her skirt since that was obviously never shown in the original cartoon.

Expect more of her in the future.

ART: Webcomic Double Feature

Fun for Two Players

I always wanted to see PvP's Jade and Miranda Fontaine do something naughty. Alas, there's not much erotic fan art of them so that forced me to do something about it...

This is basically a re-done version of an unreleased pic of mine from 2007. I replaced Max and Brent with Robbie and Jase for the comedic effect. The original pic also had Francis spying in the background but it didn't really fit in the new version.

I used older character designs as I'm not a fan of the current ones.

This is the first pic to feature my new styles of drawing cum, saliva and vaginal fluids. It is heavily inspired by the works of Joe Randel and DarkDP. I think it works better in cartoon-style than more realistic looking cum.

The alternative version here is clean of jizz:

I currently have no interest in drawing Marcy or any other women from the series.

A Most Fiendish Divulgation

Penny Arcade has been inspiring literally hundreds of yaoi pics and some rather disturbing loli material featuring Annarchy. For some reason both Kara and Brenna have been ignored in erotic fan art and there exists only two or three shoddy pics of them. I've actually drawn a couple of pics of Kara (unreleased, of course) but I never really liked how they came out. I was supposed to feature her first but that was not to happen.

I happened to be browsing both Macrochan and old PA strips one night when I suddenly had a pic idea based on the internet meme "WHY AM I SO BALD". The result can be seen above. So yeah, it's a more comedic one.

I didn't bother to clean up the pic that much because I wanted it to have a more hand-drawn look this time.

The title is, of course, a bad attempt at imitating the peculiar titles of PA's strips.

ART: Evil Is Sexy

Here it is, the pic that took me three fucking months to make. I'm dedicating it to Levelord, who's been creating fantastic Kim Possible art for so many years.

I hope you like it:

I also made an alternative version without the silly-looking sweat drops:

And now some history.

I first got an idea for this pic after watching an American porn film called Anal Secrets. It features Kitty Yung (not to be confused with Kitty Jung) riding Peter North on a cowgirl position. Her gyrating moves are really something to look at and it didn't take long until I started hatching a plan for a new pic. I've always seen Shego partially of an Oriental/Asian descent and seeing that both Shego and Kitty share a slim body and long dark hair, I immediately drew a comparison between the two. Ron was automatically chosen for the lucky guy, as he's really a staple male lead in KP pr0n anyway. Besides, Drakken's blue cock looks creepy.

My first problem was with the actual character design, as I never really learned the show's art style. Then came the trouble of choosing a right camera angle for the pic: I wanted to display Shego's body in a bendy form but I was hesitant of obstructing the view to her genitals. Unfortunately, these two things weren't really possible to have both at the same time.

I rejected my first pic, which you can see here:

Way too stiff and immobile, not to mention that it depicts the sitch after the act and not the act itself. The characters' bodies don't look as curvy as they should and there are some serious proportional errors. After that I located a forum post made by Levelord that contained character sheets from the show. I then spent about a week just sketching various Shegos to get the feel of the original design.

The final image which you just saw is essentially comprised of four different sketches combined together in Photoshop. Shego and Ron have not received automatic vector tracing, but the rest of the background has. I originally envisioned lighting effects to be similar to the poster of John Carpenter's The Thing (1982) but it was too difficult to do. The shading is a cross between simple cell shading and a blurred shading/bloom similar to what was seen in the KP movie So the Drama.

I almost had Ron eating nacho chips with his right hand but I eventually gave up because I got too lazy to clean up the inking for the chips bag. The first draft of the second pic also had Rufus with a Cannot camcorder but I eventually removed it as it was a distraction (and also meant more work for me).

This is the second time I've actually used the pen tool. The first time was in #19, which you will soon see. The bed sheets, the lower pillow and the bed itself was all done with the pen tool.

I'm still not entirely happy about Shego's head's position and her face. However, I feel that the pic turned out nice even though it was a real bitch to draw.

As a final note, I do not endorse Shego/Ron 'shipping ;P

When you see it...

This is a screencap from Mario Salieri's Salieri Football 3, which is an Italian porn film.

Now, take a closer look:

Brix were shat.

Italian porn is awesome.

DF: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

LITE ART: Stripperific Holidays

Sergio Aragonés draws some very fine-looking women. For the past 11 years I've been trying to learn his style of drawing sexy girls and I can tell you, it's a pain in the ass!

Naturally, I've been tinkering with #17 for the past few nights but during the occasional breaks I've been working on an Aragonés-style pic I felt that was actually going somewhere. I finished it ten minutes ago and I feel that it came out nicely.

With this pic I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

(BTW I won't be taking any long breaks from drawing - on the contrary!)

LITE ART: Robo-scissoring

Here's the previously private birthday pic for ToonSpew, now inked, cleaned up and in "colour".

Remember the MLaaTR pic which suffered from partial fail? I think I managed to remove the "fail" this time as I'm pretty happy with the results:


I hope you enjoy it. This time I went closer to Fern's more meatier style as I received some critique from my last MLaaTR pic for using models that had too thin body parts. I think it does look nicer now.

In other news, #17 is now completely inked and scanned! Fucking around in Photoshop will ensue tomorrow night. I doubt I'll be able to hit the deadline of 12/24/08, it'll probably get delayed a few more days.


EDIT (a few minutes later): Fixed a colouring error!

"Ridiculously NSFW"

More of the same subject.

Well, I didn't bake a ginger cock this Christmas but I did draw something that's PA related. You'll see it in a few weeks.

The best laugh I had today

Just read his (Gabe's) newspost. Damn.

LITE ART: Remembering the Forgotten

Here's a little something I drew for my pal Toonspew, for today is his birthday. It's concept art for an idea of his which features a rather grim-looking future for the forgotten ghost of Ember McLain. I also sent him a little hardcore sketch featuring Jenny and Vega getting nasty with each other. I'll probably publish that one too after I've done some retouching with it as it's a bit of a rush job.

Happy birthday, Toonspew!

TEXT: Don't You Just Hate It... in Straight porn movies

Don't you just hate it...

• ...when everyone is constantly spitting on each other's genitalia?
• ...when a girl gets her anus streched and then someone spits in there for "lubrication"?
• ...when the actresses have crooked teeth?
• ...when all the women have platinum blonde hair, balloon-shaped breast implants, skinny asses and they all wear transparent platform shoes?
• ...when most of the dialogue uttered during intercourse consists of sentences such as "oh God", "fuck me harder!" and the extremely irritating, squeakily-delivered "ooh yeah"?
• ...when the actress refuses to have sperm enter her mouth?
• ...when the actress does keep her mouth open during facials but then proceeds to drool all the semen down her chin like an infant child that has yet to learn how to eat in a clean fashion (*cough*Celeste*cough*)?
• ...when kissing is just three seconds of cheap tongue-wiggling?
• ...when there's constant ass-spanking?
• ...when there are pimples present?
• ...when the actress has a very visible bruise somewhere?
• ...how "trendy" camera techniques such as super close-ups, whip pans and "shakycam" have found their way into pornography?
• ...when there's a double penetration scene and the camera zooms closer into the action but mostly shows two hairy man-asses?
• ...when the camera zooms to show the girl gurgling semen like it's fucking mouthwash?
• ...when porn movies use cameras with wide-angle lenses to make the actress' butt look bigger?
• ...when porn movies use cameras with wide-angle lenses and then proceed to zoom into a face of a girl showing how much sperm she has heaving in her mouth in a similar fashion to those shitty-ass "funny animals" videos and postcards? I personally find this both annoying and extremely disgusting at the same time
• ...when a lesbian scene keeps going on after french kissing (okay, this is occasionally fine but most of the lesbian scenes in porn aimed for straight men just lack the passion and feels more like watching two chicks going for it like it's an assignment or something... which it pretty much is)?
• ...how reality porn tries to pass itself as reality when in fact they're mostly using lesser-known actresses, second-rate porn starlets and semi-retired professionals instead of real amateurs?
• ...when porn stars are "acting"?
• ...when a girl passionately sucks another one's strap-on and they both act like it's a real cock?
• ...when kissing and sucking scenes have overblown sound effects reminiscent of someone unplugging a toilet?
• ...when Sequelitis is even worse in porn film industry?
• ...when reality porn actors constantly crack jokes, make weird faces, laugh a lot and make small talk with the cameraman while having sex at the same time?
• ...when a girl is having two dicks in her mouth at the same time and you can see how the ends of the penises rub each other?
• ...when the soundtrack unintentionally sounds like a memorable mainstream movie theme that feels completely out-of-place in a porn flick (there's a bit of melody in the first sex scene in Vi Presento Mia Figlia that sounds like the theme from Jurassic Park - I am not making this up)?
• ...when balls are touching?
• ...when your favourite actress has a non-sex role?
• ...when your favourite actress suddenly decides to undergo plastic surgery (possibly again), altering her face so that it now looks completely different and ugly?
• ...when a guy misses the girl's face and sprays his cum all over another guys legs and hands?
• ...when a guy misses the girl's face and sprays his cum all over another guys face?
• ...when you're watching a seemingly ordinary flick and suddenly a strange fetish appears out of nowhere?
• ...when it's a trap?
• ...when a good director suddenly decides to cast this one particular actress you don't really care about in every freaking film (Mario Salieri and Julia Taylor, I'm looking at you)?
• ...when you can hear more of the guy's grunting than the girl's moaning?
• ...when Peter North aims his jizz too high so it flies past the girl's face and onto bedsheets?
• ...when the girl suddenly wants to lick the guy's asshole (note: this seems to occur mostly in Italian and French productions from 1990s and onwards)?
• ...when guys don't take off their watches, shoes or socks?
• ...when there's a scene where a guy is spying on a couple having sex and the camera constantly pans or switches to show his face?
• ...when there's a scene where a guy is spying on a couple having sex and the camera constantly pans or switches to show him jacking off?
• ...when a good sex scene is constantly cut away by non-sex scenes with other characters?
• ...when a promising sex scene never takes off (as in, the actress you like is suddenly replaced by another one, someone "busts" the couple or the script doesn't treat the particular scene as an important one and cuts away before the whole thing really gets on going)?
• ...when it turns out to be soft porn?
• ...when you're watching a seemingly straight porn movie and suddenly, during the final orgy scene, SURPRISE GAY BUTTSECKS?
• ...when a porn film is desperately trying to have a complex plot?

And finally...

• Don't you just fucking hate it when you're fapping to a porno and just when you're about to cum the scene suddenly changes to show the guy's facial expression while at the very same time you blow your load?!

With partial apologies to Not My Desk and Encyclopedia Dramatica.

Eh.

SCRAPS: dlt at work

In case you wonder how my time-consuming "manual outline cleaning" looks like, check out this pic of #18b in works:


This is not the best possible example, because I often scan my inkings in "line art" mode, then go straight to Illustrator for automatic vector trace and then clean up the malformed parts that showed up after the trace in Photoshop. This time I decided to ignore the automatic trace and directly use the original inked pic, which is why I've been digitally removing pencil marks and other unwanted artifacts. To demonstrate this I've placed a black layer underneath the working one which then proceeds to show all the spots I've scoured with "clear" line tool and eraser.

Feel free to guess who the character is (which is pretty much impossible to guess from such a vague image). Two hints: first of all, it's a webcomic-themed pic and second, that's his backside (with a t-shirt) showing.

ART: Frankiefurter

After Mac has grown up a little (in more than one way, he he) Bloo figures out a new way to make some do': reality porn!

Naturally, Frankie's the main attraction in his films.

This is the first time I've actually completed a Frankie Foster pic. I tried to do a Christmas-themed Frankie pic two years ago but it failed spectacularly. I think this pic still suffers from slightly too thick lines and badly-drawn saliva but otherwise I'm happy how it turned out. Frankie is not easy to draw even if her design looks simplistic. Even harder is to make her body look sexy from the waist down as you can't go with the original design there.

My next pic will be... well, I'm not telling you. It's going to be a surprise :)

TEXT: Fan Fic Review (Double): My Life as a Teenage Von Neumann Device and Alien Urges and Affections - When Misty Fell for Shell, Part 1 (REVIEW)

Picture courtesy of Toonspew, posted with permission

NOTE: This is something I myself promised to do, so don't expect me to start doing this constantly (reviewing fan fics, that is). I'm not interested in reading fan fics, especially if they're lemons, so don't market them to me.

This is it, the fan fic review I've been hyping for some time. In case you didn't read my foreword about it, I suggest you do so before you check out this review as it will clear up my rather negative history with written fan fiction. You can check it out here.

I may use a bunch of TV Tropes terms in this review. Don't worry though, as I will link descriptions for them. I usually bold links that direct you to a page outside my blog but for the sake of readability (is that even a word?) I'm going to restrain myself from doing so with this review.

EDIT: okay, I used tons of them. Sorry :D

Introduction

I read a bunch of MLaaTR lemons during the summer and this fall and out of those fics these two came out as the best: My Life as a Von Neumann Device, written by Toonspew, and Alien Urges and Affections - When Misty Fell for Shell, written by Sadarax. I noticed that Sadarax's fic is still incomplete so let this be the review for "part 1". Both these fics avoided some of the most dreaded fan fic tropes, such as Mary Sues, blatant and egoistic Self-Insertion and IKEA Erotica. Instead, they feature astoundingly good writing and exploration of familiar and not-so-familiar MLaaTR characters, wildly expanding their personalities beyond what was seen in the show. Toonspew's fic is whopping 23 chapters long, plus it has an epilogue, while Sadarax has so far released 9 chapters.

MLaaVND and AUaA are like night and day. Toonspew's fic reminds me a lot of the original Dragonball series (not Z, the first one) in a way it offers a seamless story with lots of different people, places and elements while slowly but surely sliding towards a BIG ending. Sadarax's fic, however, seems to go for the mellow Slice of Life ambience instead of going all Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann and so far, as I've just read the first nine chapters, has stayed very close to the atmosphere of the original series. Both lemons also feature actual plots instead of stacking mindless sex scene after another. This is awesome.

In Tremorton, TV watches YOU!!

My Life as a Von Neumann Device begins with Jenny getting laughed at school because she apparently doesn't know what "having sex" means. Due to this being a lemon, there's naturally only one way to find out! After a terrific start with a strong scent of Original Flavour and well-written sex scenes with tangible erotic tension the fic then suddenly Genre Shifts into a Darker and Edgier direction. We'll get to see Jenny and her friends tangle with The Cluster in a very similar storyline to the MLaaTR TV movie Escape from Cluster Prime - which is notable, since this part of the fic was written before the movie (makes you wonder where the show's creators got their idea for the special in the first place)! From there it all calms down before a storm of huge proportions, which culminates in a massive race against time and a finishes with a violent battle - all of this reminded me of such classic movies like The Terminator and Aliens, which is a good thing. Alongside this plot we get to see the main teen characters learn stuff the hard way, learn to take responsibility of their actions and have lots of sex.

There is one theme that usually makes me stop reading a fic when I see it pop up: main character pregnancy. Yes, this one has it too but luckily it doesn't go all mushy about the subject and it actually works as a plot device, although I still can't understand why so many fan fic writers want to write about characters becoming parents at a rather young age. Good thing Toonspew didn't include the horrendously bad sex talk line "I want to have your baby", which is something you'll see in every goddamn incest comic these days. Sheesh!

Another thing that may irritate some readers is the way MLaaVND offers variety with its sex scenes, ranging from simple blowjobs to more specific fetishes. This wouldn't actually be a bad thing as Toonspew often writes the scenes very well, but there's a rape scene slightly before midway. I used to read lots of rape-themed Star Wars fics back in 2003 so I'm sort of sanitized of this fetish. Still, I think it's something you may want to avoid when writing a fic about a cartoon series. I really can't explain why but it just doesn't click. Besides, the scene itself here doesn't work so well in my opinion because the victim recovers from it in less than 24 hours and doesn't seem to be traumatized in any way. I'd say that this particular scene is definitely the weakest point of the fic, even if it gives us a FUCK YEAH AWESOME Vexus moment shortly afterwards.

Speaking of weaknesses, I later found out that I had actually gotten myself an alternative copy of one of the chapters. The version I had featured a short scene that has been left out because fanbase deemed it as Squick. I don't want to reveal too much but let's just say that it involves Nora Wakeman, her hands and another character's penis. I actually found the scene pretty interesting and even though Nora looks anything but sexy there's no doubt that Fern or someone else of his caliber could create some kickass fan art of this scene.

Another thing that may scare some readers (and granted, it definitely scared me too) is that MLaaVND is HUEG. Still, it's suprisingly easy to read and carries on fluently. There are many great moments to be found, especially in the humour department. My absolute favourite of the bunch has to be the scene where Vexus is searching for Jenny in a party and stumbles across a group of youngsters who mistake her for a dominatrix they had ordered. Hilarity Ensues. Besides the occasional funny moments there are also lots of Crowning Moments of Awesome due to the nature of the story. My favourite has to be the "go, genie go" moment which occurs in the final chapter, a scene which would cause audiences to erupt into wild cheering if something like this was done in a movie. Toonspew also challenges the reader to pick up various pop culture references but does this in a more subtle manner without turning the fic into an episode of Family Guy. He also makes connections to other animated series, although you don't have to worry about this one turning into Mega Crossover.

Overall, MLaaVND is an entertaining story even if it abandons the lighter atmosphere after the first four chapters. Toonspew writes good English, avoids typos and doesn't explain too much. I did notice few occasions where teenagers talk in a way too mature fashion, but that's about it. There are some continuity problems (or at least so it seems) due to the story being over half-way written by the time when the Cluster TV movie aired. Then again, you could think it as an Alternate Universe Fic that departs on a different timeline right before the end of the second season of MLaaTR. Great Scott!

If you're a fan of lemons and want your fic to have a gripping story with epic battles and a few surprises along the way, you should definitely check this one out. It may be a bit dark but the ending doesn't let you down. Fan artists interested of doing MLaaTR artwork should check out at least the beginning of the fic to see how Jenny's body works. Oh, and you're going to love Tiff after reading this story.

While Jenny's away...

Remember that third season episode Mist Opportunities? Yeah, I know. Everyone likes to pretend it's Discontinuity because it's a god-awful piece of shit. Luckily for us, Sadarax has offered us something to heal the wounds caused by this (unfortunately) official Character Derailment (or as he calls it, "Character Assassination"). To be accurate he started writing the story before the third season aired but that doesn't matter as he hasn't placed it in any precise timeline: it could happen before third season or after it. I like to think it's happening after the third season, which I guess it what Sadarax also suggests. Keep in mind that this isn't a Fix Fic but rather a good mix of a lemon and a Lower Deck Episode meant to flesh out the personalities of Sheldon and Misty, who's a Flat Character in the show... which is strange because I believe she's popular among fans. Perhaps the writers thought they didn't need to develop a character who started out as a Teen Titans reference? I don't know the answer to this but I do know that Misty could've (and should have) gotten a better final appearance.

Alien Urges and Affections takes place during a period where Jenny, Brad and Nora Wakeman are temporarily out of country showcasing the abilities of XJ-9 to friendly foreign governments. This is a perfect setup for a slice-of-life story which follows the daily lives of Misty and Sheldon. Misty has temporarily taken up Jenny's job in protecting Tremorton from The Cluster and other possible threats. Unfortunately, she is getting majorly bored due to her best friend being away for such a long time. This leads to her getting curious about Sheldon, so Misty decides to find out what the boy is like and give him a chance as a friend. The Crusts, always up to no good, notice this and start spying on them, hoping to get something juicy out of this strange situation.

I can't give you a complete opinion about this story since it is yet to be finished and it may go through a Genre Shift after the ninth chapter. So far the fic has done immense exploring of Misty and Sheldon's characters, developing them far beyond what was seen in the show. While I'm a Jenny/Sheldon shipper, I don't really mind pairing him with Misty. So far I've mostly come across situations that build up sexual tension between Misty and Sheldon, although there will no doubt be more actual sex in the following chapters.

For me the best part about the fic is how Sadarax is able to make Misty feel like an alien instead of "just" some girl with purple skin and superpowers. This is done by playing with words like "mating", "species", "egg-layer" and so on. It adds an exotic feel to her character without making it Squick. He also gives more background of her species and their reproduction and mating. This is done in the form of a sex scene, of course, which is great because that's exactly what you're supposed to find in a lemon and not some biology lecture. We also get to see some Humans Through Alien Eyes, which is a lot of fun.

I couldn't really find any defecting thing about the story or how the characters are handled. Sure, there's one thing that would probably count as Self-Insertion but it's mostly harmless. I also found the alien dojo flashback a bit cheesy but I guess that is because I don't find reading about/watching girls sucking on a dildo very interesting so it's just a matter of taste. The story's a good one, the characters are nicely written and the subplot with The Crusts and the occasional Cluster attack are good for keeping up tension in an otherwise peaceful story.

However, there is one thing that actually bothered me with the fic: the sheer amount of explanation. Words. Lots of them. It's not the same thing as writing bad text or having a poor grasp on grammar, on the contrary. Sadarax writes good text - there's just too much of it. There were occasional paragraphs that were mostly just metatext which the actual lemon doesn't really need there.

In short, AUaA is a top-notch fic which suffers from Walls of Text. This may cause trouble for those who aren't of the reader types but I suggest giving it a try, especially if you're craving for learning more about Misty and Sheldon. Besides, it's good medicine for those of you (i.e. almost everyone) who got pissed off at how Misty's character was handled at her final appearance in the show.

Which one's better?

I can't really decide which one I liked better. Overall, I enjoyed the variety of MLaaVND but I felt more home with the AUaA's setting as I'm not a fan of dark and epic tales. Then again, AUaA was occasionally laborious to read while MLaaVND was easy to digest. So yeah, I guess it's a tie, heh :P

Probably the best thing about both fics is how they defend Sheldon's quirks, explore the reasons for his obsession of Jenny and wreck allegations of him being solely a robophile. Sheldon was pretty much the Butt Monkey of the original show and occasionally it felt that even his friends treated him like crap.

Oh, and one notable thing about Sadarax's fic: Tuck isn't there. That's great. I really hate that little Scrappy.

Links to the fics!

My Life as a Teenage Von Neumann Device, by Toonspew
Alien Urges and Affections - When Misty Fell for Shell (chapters 1-9), by Sadarax

LITE ART: Oops

Guess what? I drew a picture! This one's for all you unlucky bastards who forgot to turn off your sounds before taking a photo of that juicy ass with your cell phone camera:

Tucker's gonna get his ass whooped in three seconds.

Since it's not really a proper picture (as it's not vectored nor coloured and you can still see some pencil marks) but too elaborate to be a quick sketch (it took me about 2-3 hours to, I have to categorize this into something else. The first thing that popped into my mind was the word "lite", so there you have it.

For the inspiration of this pic I blame Levelord, my first drawfagging night at /co/ and a recent chat I had with Sniper Tomcat.

Oh, and if that was a DrawnSex pic, it'd be titled OPS.

EDIT (later): some joker decided to make an edit of the pic where Tucker's absent and instead it's Jazz who's eyeing Maddie's ass. I had nothing to do with that variation.

TEXT: Fan Fic Review (Double): My Life as a Teenage Von Neumann Device and Alien Urges and Affections - When Misty Fell for Shell, Part 1 (FOREWORD)

NOTE: This isn't the actual review yet. Just a foreword. The review will be made when I've completed reading the last two chapters of the second fic, although I still prioritize drawing before writing so it may take a while.

When I finally stopped lurking around and decided to show up the world what I had been doing for 11 years, it didn't take long before I met some people who wanted to showcase their works to me. However, instead of artwork I was greeted with huge-ass documents, telling spicy stories of famous toon characters. I said to myself, "I wonder if I should start reading fan fiction again".

Back in '99 and '00, I used to be a regular at a South Park fan site called Mr. Hat's Hell-Hole, where I used to read quite a few fics, often written by teenage girls. I used to enjoy these stories, although now that I think of it they were pretty much OC-ridden garbage (anyone remember the red-haired female cousin of Kyle's, who was basically a Rule 63 version of Eric Cartman and also a witch? Yeah, the fics were that bad... I wonder what her name was). I eventually lost my interest in 2001 when the quality of the fics started dropping (yes, that actually was possible) and I got past "The Stupid Age" and realized how awful the overall writing was.

During the following years I joined SWEF. During frequent checks to see if Shabby Blue had posted new artwork, I eventually had a peek at the fan fiction they were offering. There were some pretty nice lemons that contrasted the lenghty South Park fics by not telling a big story but rather delivering well-written hardcore sex scenes. A lot of the stories depicted rape scenes and sexual domination (but not actual BSDM). I eventually got tired of them too after the trend started to shift towards writing longer, more epic stories with lots of OCs and the stories started to become carbon copies of each other. This was in 2004 or so and after that, I've avoided written fan fiction.

Until last summer, that is.

The majority of the fics I was recently offered to read were MLaaTR fics, although there's also one big TFOP fic which is still incomplete. I went through some of these fics and... well, let's just say that overall I'd still like to stick to rather making fun of cliché-ridden fan stories than reading them. There was one fic so horrifyingly bad it almost succeeded in making me give up my noble attempt to start reading fan fics again for the third time - and that's the fic I happened to read first. I'm not giving out the name of the fic nor who wrote it out of courteousity but I have to mention that there are many others that dislike it and they silently addressed their sympathies to me after I read that damn thing.

However, I won't be reviewing this monstrousity. I'm here to showcase the best two fics of the bunch. Stay tuned for a double review of Toonspew's My Life as a Teenage Von Neumann Device and Sadarax's Alien Urges and Affections - When Misty Fell for Shell (chapters 1 to 9)!

DF: 'sup again, /co/

Another bunch of drawfaggotree. This time it didn't go so well, as I wasn't really prepared for Round 2 so soon. You have to be in a certain mood for this to work.

Anyway, the requests were: more Frankie, more Vicky, more Spectra/Wuya (starting to see a pattern here?) and Sam with Ember. I also drew two "filler" pics, which were quick monochrome close-ups of Vegeta, with the second pic depicting him as super saiyan (as requested).

I decided to call it quits earlier because 1) the quality of my artwork started to shift towards QUALITY, which is embarrassing and 2) I have to wake up early, so I can't stay up as late as last night.

Until we meet again! That is, tomorrow. No, I won't be drawing but I'm a regular there so I may post a message or two. As for future drawfaggotree events, well... I'd say I need a long break. These things are fun but burn lots of time.

DF: Still Alive

Yeah, the thread's still around. I'm not sure if I'm going to continue drawfagging tonight since I have to catch up with my primary art - that is, to deliver you some Frankie Foster.

Here's a quick vector trace one Anon posted on /co/ with my permission:

Thanks!

Oh, and here are some more /co/ goodies I found (the first one being the Frankie pic which started the thread, so yeah, it wasn't originally my thread):

DF: 'sup /co/

in b4 gb2/v/


EDIT (9/25): Here are the original descriptions for these images I drew:


"Herrimen."

dasheer: /r/ pic of Frankie as a tank.
dlt: I tried to draw that but then I just lost it. Have this unfunny shit instead (over 9000 hours in MS Paint etc.). No, this isn't the drawing I was talking about earlier.


"Drunk Desiree"

onlyx'sfan: Ah. I see.
....
/r/ing drunk Desiree :3.
dlt: Damnit, you should've said that earlier. Now look what you made me do :( (On a sidenote, this is probably the first time I've drawn Desirée not being topless, lol)
I'm not much of a drawfag so excuse the lack of quality. I'm more of those slowpokes who'll draw one pic for like a month. Also, thanks for the warm welcome :)


"Jenny for /co/"

Kastere Lumbermouth: Frankie. ANYTHING with Frankie. Possibly Jenny as well.
dlt: I tried to post this earlier but nothing happened. Timed out, I guess. Here's some XJ-9. Anyway, I'm not much of a MLaaTR artist, I guess the banner for my blog is a bit misleading. I just can't figure out how to draw a believable robot vag00.


"Maddie for /co/"

hypno: listen to this man (onyx'sfan) and add Maddie
onlyx'sfan: God, I hope my joke doesn't start a flood of /r/ that drives dlt away.
...Drunk Desiree and Maddie would kick ass, though.
dlt: Well, since nobody's looking anymore, might as well stop this and get back to drawing Frankie. Here's some Mega MILF.


"Spectra/Wuya"

Anonymous: eh? (posts a double feature of Wuya by Linno and Spectra as Las Vegas showgirl by DarkDP)
dlt: Just some bullshit scenario I came up. Forgive the plagiarization of Linno's Wuya, I think he draws her hotter than she looks in the series (at least this is the conclusion I came to after a quick Google image search). I guess I now see how much freaking fun D. J. Coffman has with his Will Draw Anything, only he gets paid $2 per piece and he uses a Cintiq :P


"The Sequel to my recent TFOP pic: BAD END"

Bluejr: Well my only request would be anything with Tootie from FOP but I know she is not your favorite character.... But if you would a pic of Tootie and Veronica punching Timmy for last night act.....?
Anonymous: Veronica holding him while Tootie punches him wearing 'Hulk Hands'(R) would be amusing as hell.
Bluejr: yes
dlt: The Tootie/Veronica pic may upset some shippers but what do I care, lol
Anonymous: All the more reason
Bluejr: LOL you forget where you are?
dlt: Nah, just thinking about That One Place where I also post my art. Then again, I've received some helpful advice from a bunch of other artists there so I pretty much know where to draw the line. I have to go AFK soon, it's been fun and I think we could have another round sometime. I'll upload all the drawings to my blog so you can get them from there when this thread dies. Anyway, I can take one more request if you're willing to suggest. The Tootie/Veronica pic will be next.
dlt: FALCON PAAAAANCH!!!!!!!!!!!
I'll decide about the final pic in a sec.


"Eris for /co/"

Anonymous: Any chance to convence you to do some Eris as the final?
dlt: Eris from Billy & Mandy then? Okay then. BTW I'm not a fan of that cartoon, Billy's just so fucking annoying.
While I'm drawing, anyone care to explain why she looks like a slutty toga party entrant?
Anonymous: She's the Greek goddess of chaos
dlt: ...and there. Took a little bit longer because I've never drawn her before.
if there's any interesting threads around to post stupid comments to then I'll be seeing you again tomorrow.


Oh, and one guy thought I drew the softcore Spectra/Jazz pic by Levelord. I'm flattered!

ART: Three's a Company

It is done. My first TFOP pic and good old hardcore action, too. Here we have an older Timmy Turner having fun with the two TFOP girls I personally feel are the hottest of the bunch. Veronica's pretty mad that she got left out of the whole fun and her suffering seems to bring sadistic pleasure to Vicky :D

It took me forever to draw but I think it eventually came out exactly the way I wanted it to be. Try not to get distracted by the impossible perspective on Timmy - infact, blame Butch Hartman for a character design that doesn't work in all angles. Also, no shadows because the original show doesn't have them unless they suddenly want dramatic scenes. Instead, have some window effects, lol

Hope you like it.

EDIT (one hour later): just wanted to mention some things about the pic. Note that Vicky's philtrum is not visible because I thought leaving it out would make her hotter. Also note that she's based on her "18-year-old" appearance from the TV movie Channel Chasers, which is why she has an ear ring... which looks like it was actually stolen from Jade Fontaine from Steve Kuntz's mediocre webcomic PvP. Oh, and Trixie's pose comes from this movie.

SCRAPS: Fairy Fishes

The upcoming TFOP pic has been slightly delayed. I do have good news, though: it has finally entered colouring phase! This is usually done pretty quickly, although I'm still preparing to give it three more days to be finally done.

In the meantime, here's a teaser of the pic: a black and white, inked, vector traced and digitally polished version of Cosmo and Wanda from the pic!

Note that all the stuff in gray is just placeholder shit.

Edit (14/9): some things that need to be announced... first of all, I won't be drawing a comic about two pseudo-goldfish having sex, nor there will be loli. Second, I'm delaying the pic even more, make it five or six days! This is because I think I'd like to try a new colouring/shading method.

LOL FAME

I know, old news but noticed it just now. Wichobot posted Girlfriends, Too on The Teenage RoBlog X in August 15th. I'm honored, man!

"THIS IS PROOF, PEOPLE!!!"

The aftermath of the earlier SCIENCE! babies thread. Still very lulz.

EDIT (7/19): Apparently I've pissed off some dork at 7chan when I expressed my opinion about this subject. I believe this is the first time I've been called a "faggot" outside of Counter-Strike. That's pretty good considering that I've been using teh internets since 1995 or so.

Drakken haet KiGo lulz

Couldn't let this one pass. I just noticed that someone had started a "Kasy Ann & Sheki Go" (which I believe are the "official" KiGo kids) thread over at 4chan's /co/. It took three minutes until someone replied with this cap:


I lol'd.

Other awesome replies:

"It is shit like this which prevents me from wanting to actually read fanfiction."
- Anonymous

"GENETICS DO NOT WORK THIS WAY!"
- Anonymous

"I don't know how to feel about this /co/. It's absolutely fucking stupid. But it's lesbians. And it's kind of hot I guess. The science babies thing is incredibly retarded. I feel part of me wanting to facepalm and the other part wanting to fap. Is this how Yaoi Fangirls feel all the time /co/? Like no matter how incredibly stupid the pairing is or doesn't make sense it's ok as long as I can fap to it?"
- Anonymous

"Someone should draw Kasy and/or Sheki 34."
- Anonymous

Anonymous then concluded that this image reflects how he feels when he's watching KiGo art:


This is where the true fun of 4chan comes from. Oh, and in case you wonder - I wholeheartily agree with most of the posters about this subject.

ART: Girlfriends, Too

It is finally done.

First, I have some good news and some bad news, both concerning the pic.

The bad news is that Vega is not naked. I'm sorry but I just couldn't pull it off properly. Even though I had some great help from looking at Fern's art and reading Toonspew's MLaaTR fic My Life as a Teenage Von Neumann Device I simply ran out of skill to make a robot pussy look believable. I eventually settled for a modest panty version. I may have lost this battle but the war's not over because I will return doing MLaaTR art in the future and eventually I'll solve this problem. It may be a while before I do another one but I'm not giving up, that's for sure.

The good news is that I paired Vega with another girl, someone a lot of you would've wanted to see instead of her. I also made an alternative version with Vega wearing boots.

The working title of this pic was simply "MLaaTR pic" but I eventually settled for "Girlfriends, Too" which was originally a name for a second pic of a two-parter lesbian-themed Jenny piece (the first one depicting Jenny/Misty and the second one Jenny/Vega) I was planning to do before I changed my mind about it.

The background is just from a free Photoshop brush set I downloaded about two months ago.

I hope you like it! :)














EDIT (7/14): I was informed that Misty's lacking her "antennae" thingie. I actually did draw it but I eventually left it out because it looked like a small purple plant growing out of Vega's vertebral column. Now it's "hidden" behind Vega :P

SCRAPS: Why is she so bald?

Beats me.

Actually this is just something that came up to me when I was reading Toonspew's MLaaTR fic My Life as a Teenage Von Neumann Device. That, and browsing Macrochan.

Note the old school Scott Kurtz-esque mouth on Tiff. Now that I've mentioned Scott Kurtz, I also have to say this: KURTZ IS A HACK! :P

Time for sleep!

SCRAPS: What is he seeing?

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